Happiness Molecules!
I overheard a commercial on tv the other day (I have no idea what the ad was actually about...I usually don't), and the narrator said something about "happiness molecules." I don't know where to get those, but I want some.
I was sad because I was unemployed for 7 months, now I have a job, making more money, but I'm still in "sad" mode. Anyone who has read my blog probably knows that I suffer from chronic depression, and have for most of my life, and though I have little control over it, I used to be just swell. The past year of course has knocked me for a loop and I'm trying to get back to my happy spot, and some happiness molecules would be great.
I'm thinking I could be ok without happiness molecules if my cat would realize once and for all that throwing up doesn't get him any more attention than not throwing up and he would decide to STOP! It would also help if it never rained again and everyday was sunny and bright and lovely. It might also help if I were independently wealthy and could sit outside at a coffee shop all day, everyday and make fun of everyone who had to work. It would also help if I found my Lite-Brite from childhood. Those bright colored pegs used to cheer me up when I stared directly into them (that could also be why I'm legally blind). I think it might help if I were someone else...
OK, no, it never helps to be someone else because everyone else comes with their own baggage and set of problems, and I don't want to wake up one day and be someone wealthy but with turrets syndrome (I'm allowed to talk about other people's disorders because I have obsessive compulsive disorder and laugh at myself so I don't want anyone whining that I'm not being politically correct). I would rather my cat throw up than having him be gone, and if I had my Lite-Brite now, I would forget to turn it off at night and it would catch the carpet on fire, then I'd be homeless.
"And in the sea there is a fish,
A fish that has a secret wish,
A wish to be a big cactus
With a pink flower on it."
-Kimya Dawson
--Fortuitous Observer


You can borrow my lite-brite, though it only has clear/white, blue and purple pegs. I have a new bulb for it as well. A little black construction paper and you'd be ready to go.
"I was looking for a job and then I found a job
and Heaven know I'm miserable now
in my life,
why do I smile
to people I'd much rather kick in the eye?"
The Smiths, "Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now"
Posted by: Ariel | September 29, 2009 at 10:07 AM