Soul Thumping

Musical chairs - A Childhood Game Responsible for My Nightmares

Last Friday Poseidon and I were hosting one of our legendary fire pit parties and as I carried chairs from the patio to the yard, I had a kindergarten flashback that stopped me cold in my tracks (literal tracks...I was trying to step in my existing foot steps each time I carried a chair):  Musical chairs.  I hated this game with every fiber of my being.  Pressure.  Pressure to win, to be the victor.  Pressure to get through this rot of a game without embarrassing myself.  The word "game" implies fun.  Evil trickery!

If you've read any of my previous posts, my aversion to most childhood games, not just musical chairs (the Chutes and Ladders post is eerily similar), is well documented.  Stress and anxietal depression are my long-time pals (the kind of friends you really don't want to play with but are too shy to say no to them), and competitive games were enough to make me sweat and tremble in sheer terror (fortunately, I was usually able to stop short of vomiting), and musical chairs was among the worst, in my opinion.

On one particular occasion when playing this game, I remember wearing a red dress with red socks and black shoes.  I was so nervous and hoping to heck I would be near a chair when the music stopped.  The anxiousness of it all turned me a nice shade of white (which I'm sure looked lovely against my red dress, red socks and black shoes).  There were three of us left, and two chairs.  The music played and played and played.  I was ready.  As soon as the music finally stopped, I turned to plant me behind in one of the remaining seats, but one of my little black patent leather shoes had other plans for me, and headed in the opposite direction.  I ended that round of musical chairs with my behind on the floor, not in one of those two seats.

Luckily, I kept my dignity in tact by not exposing my ruffled panties or this ending would have been much worse...written from behind the walls of a padded room, wrapped in a nice warm straight jacket, typing with my nose.

 

--Fortuitous Observer

Mah Na Mah Na: The Generation X Theme Song - Captain Kangaroo and the Muppets

Hurray, the song is my head and even an exorcism won't make it leave.  When the new Muppet movie came out a few weeks ago, Poseidon and I and our pals went to see it and we had amazing fun!  Nearly every member of the audience was a Gen Xer, and very few children (except for the woman who thought is was appropriate to bring an infant into a movie theater).  We laughed and sang as we spent an hour and some change with our old furry friends, the Muppets.  My favorite part?  The obligatory singing of the Mah Na Mah Na song of course!

I ransacked my brain (and didn't clean up afterwards) to remember where I first heard the Mah Na Mah Na song, and I don't think it was the Muppet Show on television, I believe, though I could be wrong, I heard in on Captain Kangaroo TV show.  I vaguely remember some round balls that "danced" or flung themselves around to the beat of the Mah Na Mah Na song.  It seems as though it was a semi-regular skit on Captain Kangaroo.

I tried to find a clip of the Captain Kangaroo version on Youtube, but no success.  If anyone finds a clip of the Mah Na Mah Na à la the Captain, please let me know, will ya?

Now I'm swimming in a great warm wave of nostalgia thinking about the Captain Kangaroo show.  He brought us so many memorable characters (Mr. Moose, Bunny Rabbit, Mr. Green Jeans).  The Captain also brought us Simon in the land of chalk drawings (I'm humming those lyrics now in my head...not out loud), Grandfather clock, ping pong balls!  I'm so excited I can only do this:

 

 

And this:

 

 

--Fortuitous Observer

Blue Record on a Turntable: A Post-Christmas Pick-Me-Up

Poseidon and I survived Christmas in Florida (78 to 80 degree weather isn't too shabby for December).  We even went out fishing one day with the parental units.  I caught nil, but Poseidon caught a sting ray and a small shark, both were promptly set free of course...we don't need dead sea animal karma on our hands.  Catch and release.

Now, back to the grind.  I have only a 3-day work week to endure, but I'm already whining in what is my usual fashion.  I feel the need to post an after-Christmas-pick-me-up.  I came across this image a few weeks ago and decided to save it to my collection of happy pictures for future use, and today is as good a day as any.

Today I may even attempt the futile task of scribbling out a New Year's resolution or two (I usually don't make resolutions, but my sister inspired me with hers, so why not), putting off the work that I actually get paid to do for an hour or so.  Maybe less whining in 2012 should take the top spot on my list of resolutions?  Now that just made me laugh so hard I nearly choked.  The phrase, "save one's breath" popped immediately to mind.

Happy post-Christmas Tuesday cyber world.

 

Photo from Dan Stiles from Sharesomecandy (one of my favorite "happy" sites):

 

--Fortuitous Observer

My Christmas "Yeah!" Countdown: You Can Decorate ANYTHING for Christmas

I think I now have Poseidon's cold, so this will probably be my last countdown to Christmas post (boo, I already miss Christmastime, and Christmas isn't even here yet).

Apparently, you can decorate anything you want for the holidays.  Christmas...it's not just for trees anymore.

Decorate an entire house, trees, and yard (photo from mentalfloss.com):

 

One can even decorate a vacant lot (Athens report):

 

How about a boat? (from moon.com):

 

 

Your motorcyle! (photo from Snapshots):

 

 

What about the family pet? He looks merry  (photo from Sunday's Child):

 

Yes, you can even decorate your RV in holiday finery (from The Funtimes Guide):

 

--Fortuitous Observer

 

My Christmas "Yeah!" Countdown: Couture de Noël

Snow, snow, where are you?  It's only days away from Christmas, but the temps outside are still going to be in the upper 60s, making it feel more like spring than Christmastime.  Boo.  To keep my mind on the holidays and my spirit basking in the delights of the season, I'm continuing my Christmas countdown series, and today I'm sharing a bit of couture de Noël.

 

Couture Christmas Velvet Rope from tinyprints:

 

Hey, a Christmas tree dress!  Photo from Paris Atelier:

 

Another Christmas tree dress (a shiny silver tree dress) from Paris Atelier:

 

--Fortuitous Observer

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Christmas "Yeah!" Countdown: Christmas Bird Houses!

Watching the cardinal feasting from our bird feeder on Sunday, the cardinal being decked out in his brightest red finery of the season, made me think of decorating the bird feeder for Christmas--I held that thought for only a nano second...any longer and I would have acted on impulse.

I can imagine our bird friends gathering at the feeder (aglow with tiny blinking lights, oh, and a wreath), enjoying their sunflower seeds, chirping about their decision to stay here for Christmas this year rather than flying south.  Maybe next year I will festoon the feeder, but the idea did inspire me to search for Christmas bird houses this morning, and viola:

 

From the More Chic Than Shabby blog:

 

 

From Yard Envy, the Gingerbread bird house:

 

 

This picture is from the Christmas market in Hamburg, Germany and I like the grouping of the houses...posted on Diary of a Mad Hausfrau blog:

 

 

Ah, snowy and serene, from Melody Maison:

 

 

From Happy Together, the Sugar Plum bird house!

 

--Fortuitous Observer

 

 

The Amazon Price Check App vs. Brick-And-Mortar Hullabaloo...My Two Cents

Earlier this morning, Poseidon forwarded to me the New York Times opinion article written last week, "Amazon's Jungle Logic" by Richard Russo.  This opinion piece is in response to the infamous Amazon app, Price Check, that seems to be causing so much uproar, most notably from small/local bookstores.  I also read a few other articles on the subject today (between XML code changes and researching error messages...you know, my day job "stuff"), and I understand the clamor and the Amazon "backlash," but I also understand Amazon.

I don't claim to be an expert, but as a reader of books and habitué of all things internet, I'm right down the middle on this one, and here are my thoughts on the matter (worth probably 1/2 cent).

Some Background

The Amazon Price Check app (which I do not have by the way) gives customers the ability, while shopping at any brick-and-mortar store, to scan the barcodes of items also sold by Amazon.com, to get instant price comparisons between the store and Amazon.com.  What shopper wouldn't love this?  Of course, the issue under scrutiny is that Amazon's promotion of the Price Check app gives customers $5 off (up to $15) purchases made through the app at Amazon.

 

The Controversy

There are, as I see it, two major bones of contention with Amazon's new app and I'm spouting off on both:

1.  Many view this is as an ingenious (others might say insidious) strategy for gathering price data from competitors.  This concept is nothing new folks.

A friend of mine who got his MBA back in 1991 started his new job, with a very well known company (no longer in business by the way), as a price gatherer--though I don't know what the actual professional term was for this position way back when.  His duties required him to drive around the southeast to visit the retail stores of his company's competitors, check their prices on certain items, and report back.  His company would publish coupons in local papers for consumers to cut out, take in, and rake in.  The only difference I see in the Amazon Price Check app promotion and the days of yore couponing?  Technology.  Technological advances since the early 90s allow Amazon to save gas and staff salaries, and consumers who want to spend less (including not paying sales tax) do the leg work.

 

2.  As I mentioned earlier, it appears that small mom-and-pop book stores are the most offended with Amazon and their Price Check app.  I'll say one or two things about this.  First, the Amazon Price Check promotion does not include book sales, or so I've read...again, I don't have the app and won't be downloading it.  The melee could simply end here, but of course, it doesn't.

I like, no I love going to small independent book sellers in our area and that won't change.  As long as books are still printed on paper, I'll be perusing the shelves.  Why would I do that when the book prices are sometimes more than Amazon's prices and I have to pay local sales tax?  Because I can't "browse" the shelves of Amazon.com in person.  Book stores are like candy stores to me.  I like looking at the book covers, seeing the artwork up close and personal, thumbing through the pages, and more importantly, people watching.  I can't (and don't really want to, honestly) people watch on Amazon.  I'm not a coffee drinker, but believe it or not, some civilized folks actually enjoy a nice cup of coffee while reading in the comfort of a local book seller's brick-and-mortar establishment while listening to some cool beat music from the past.

For those worried about your favorite independent book stores closing up shop due to the likes of Amazon, don't, and I highly recommend this Forbes blog post, "Amazon and the Starbucks Effect" by E.D. Kain.  Kain has actually written a few posts on the topic of the internet and future of local businesses, and in another blog post, "The Future of Local Business is Selling an Experience" he says, "That’s the future of local businesses – a multi-faceted experience that goes beyond the product itself."

 

Kain summarizes this entire issue better than I ever could in yet another blog post, "Shop everywhere. I do. I shop at Amazon regularly. But I wouldn’t dream of spying on my local bookseller for the behemoth in the market."

As demanders of the latest and greatest, we have only ourselves to blame.  If the technology exists, and can exist (and there is no going back now), businesses, both Herculean online entities and local retailers will use the technology they can afford to do what they've always done:  vie for our business.  We require they court us and woo us with something, whether it be an experience or a coupon...be careful what you ask for.

 

--Fortuitous Observer

Getting a Haircut and the Looming Drama that Comes Along

Is it wrong to take a handful of valium before my hairdresser has cut one hair on my head?  I like new, fresh haircuts.  I don't like getting my haircut.  Sitting in the chair, making small talk with my hairdresser (don't get me wrong, I love, love my hairdresser), anxiously awaiting the outcome is excruciatingly painful for me.  I would rather be lambasted in the nose with a cast aluminum meat tenderizer.

I bring this up because I have an appointment with my hairdresser this afternoon.  She does a great job in coloring the little grey hairs that keep sneaking in (those jerks), and she is very creative, offering suggestions for my length, layers, new styles, etc.

I think it all boils down to a C O N T R O L   T H I N G.  I'm sitting helplessly in a salon chair that can be pumped up or down at the whim of my hairdresser, with a smock wrapped around me like a straight jacket while my hairdresser, whom I don't know all that well, is hovering over me with a pair of sharp scissors.  I'm subconsciously concerned about escaping with my life should the need arise.  

I don't understand it really, but I just accept the fact that haircut = drama.  I've never once had an  incident while getting my hair cut--other than coming away with a few lousy dos that I don't talk about, except with my therapist.  Someday I would like to be able to confidently walk in and request a T w i g g y
haircut, but I don't have the face for it and the end result may push me over the edge.

 

 

--Fortuitous Observer

Generation X - Our Favorite TV Christmas Specials

I think I've posted this every year for the past few years.  It's a link to an article I wrote for Associated Content (now Yahoo Voices).  A great list of TV Christmas specials we (Generation X) enjoyed as kids and still do today (Ok, at least I do)!

Take a Stroll Through the Winter Wonderland of TV Specials from Christmases Past!

 

--Fortuitous Observer

Christmas Shopping Etiquette - Manners ARE Required, Lunkheads

Photo from CBC News

It is no secret that I'm caught up in the Christmas spirit this year, more so than in years past, and I'm trying to keep this train of cheer and goodwill toward man chugging forward, but it is also no secret that I'm a cynic, I'm convinced many people should undergo forced lobotomies, and I'm easily annoyed with stupidity; therefore, Christmas shopping in a public store/mall is a true ordeal for me.

Happily, I've done most of my holiday shopping online and have not had to endure many trips to public places where I'm more than likely to encounter rude, entitled miscreants.  It is this lack of interaction with dimwits that has allowed me to keep my good mood and Christmasy cheer intact!

Because even the most conscientious of people, those who know the spoken and unspoken rules of what constitutes good behavior in a polite society, can become a subnormal dolt while out and about during this festive season, I want to remind everyone of a few Christmas shopping rules of etiquette:

• If someone holds a door open for you as you juggle your purchases say, "Thank you."  If I hold a door open for you and you do not say, "Thank you,"  I'm going to let you know that you didn't say it, and I will be sure to let everyone within earshot hear me schooling you in Christmas shopping etiquette.

• Do NOT walk around in circles like a dimwit talking on your cell phone in the middle of a store like you would if you were home.  Why?  Because YOU ARE NOT AT HOME!  You are in a public space where people do their shopping and they do not need, and most importantly, want to hear your banal conversation about...ANYTHING!

• This could be lumped in with number 2, but enough impudent donkeys do this that it requires its own bullet...texting while standing in the middle of an aisle in a store as others are trying to shop around you is not acceptable behavior.  What shocks me about this is most of the offenders I encounter are not teenagers, they are the moms of teenagers.  I know you are trying to show everyone what a hip cool chick you are and that you have an iPhone (that your husband has to keep showing you how to use), but holding up other shoppers and forcing them to go around you isn't cool.  Put it down, or go sit on a bench and text your bff.  Maybe you think you can shop and text at the same time, but you CAN'T.  I know, because I CAN'T!

• It is the Christmas season, and people will be shopping, stores will be crowded and you are not the only one in the store.  There WILL be lines at the registers, for the bathrooms, for food, etc.  You are not entitled to ask others in line if you can go ahead of them.  I was asked this a few years ago by a woman who was huffing and puffing and shuffling around in line because she was mad that she, Queen of the Land of Faux Fur and YSL Bags, had to wait.  She asked me (in a very haughty manner) if she could go ahead of me because she only had 2 items and I had 4.  I gave her my gargoyle stare for many seconds and said nothing.  She slipped back to her place in line, didn't say another word and I'm sure she had nightmares about me that night. 

• If a sales clerk has done nothing to you, or has given you no reason to be a cad, then DON'T.  Trust me, they don't want to wait on you anymore than you would want to wait on them.  This also goes the other way around:  Sales clerks, if I haven't been rude to you, don't be rude to me.  Thank you.

• Lastly...baby strollers that are 6 feet wide.  Ladies, if you can't get a babysitter, and you don't have a small "appropriate for tight quarters" stroller, then stay home and do your shopping online.  I don't mean to offend anyone with children, but the monstrous strollers that could double as freight haulers are not befitting for crowded stores.  I was shopping in a small (and I mean S M A L L) gift shop once, and the owner of the boutique posted a sign just outside the door that said "No Strollers Allowed." Of course, an entitled, rude dragon-woman brought her stroller inside because that sign was clearly for everyone but her, and this stroller was so wide it wouldn't fit down the aisles.  As I was looking at some cards, she stood there waiting for me to move out of her way and when I didn't, she started clearing her throat.  I won't repeat what I said to her, but some of the other patrons actually clapped for me.  Woman and stroller swiftly left the store.  Please don't be rude and expect everyone to work around your rudeness.

That is all.  I hope everyone is having a lovely Christmas season so far!  Stay safe out there, and wear chain maille if necessary!

 

--Fortuitous Observer