Several weeks ago, on my daily run around the lake near my home, I was chased by a goose. I didn't fault the goose because the goose's babies, or goslings to be correct, had just hatched, and I'm sure they were concerned that I was up to no good, and that I would do something sinister, like eat their babies, kidnap them and put them up for sale in the underground goose market, or kick punt them into the lake. I love animals, but they didn't know that.
Now that the goslings are a bit older and stronger, you would think the geese would leave me alone. I run around that lake almost every day, and if I haven't touched the babies by now, I'm not going to. That isn't good enough for these geese. I'm still a potential rapscallion, out to do harm. Today, while doing my usual 2 mile run, I spotted a goose in the running path ahead of me. He seemed to be hanging out, minding his business, and as I got closer, I slowed my speed a bit, just in case the goose wanted to cross in front of me. He didn't. He wanted to eat me! OK, maybe not exactly devour me, but he squawked and ran toward me, beak wide open! I didn't think geese attacked unless provoked, or if they are protecting their babes. Maybe I scared him. I also thought geese were vegetarians and that I would not be a likely meal. Not the case (I looked it up when I got back home: http://www.poultrypages.com/goose-facts.html)! They like a little meat in their diet.
I talked to the goose, assuring him I was not going to hurt him, his mate or his children. Even though I'm unemployed, I can still pay for food, explaining that I was not out foraging for dinner and uninterested in goose liver pate at the moment.
He seemed to accept this and backed off to let me pass. Whew. I ran what was left of my 2 mile trail, headed back home, made sure I had no fowl in my fridge, and spent the rest of the afternoon contemplating a stiff drink rather than job searching.
--Fortuitous Observer
