Not 15 minutes into my shopping trip at Kroger yesterday, and I had to run for cover. It was Senior Citizen Day, which happens once a week (I believe seniors save 5% or so on groceries on "Senior Day") and it was brutal. Now, I've been to Kroger on Senior Day, and yes, it can be annoying with everyone shuffling along and taking up the already narrow aisles with their walkers and carts, but I usually escape, unscathed. I'll admit I do get impatient when they have a cart full of groceries and ignore the "15 Items or Less" signs (who doesn't), but I try to keep in mind, what if this was my grandmother? I'd let her get away with it (maybe).
Yesterday was different. It was frightening, almost barbaric, and I now have to sleep with the light on to keep the nightmares away. It started in the produce section, with a little old lady yelling at the gentleman who was stocking the green leafy vegetables. She demanded (and I do mean demanded) to know why the ears of corn were so expensive! I don't know what the gentleman said, but she replied with, "Well, then I guess I won't be freezing corn this year will I?" and she stomped off like a 5 year old. Oh my! But wait, there is more. She circled back to the corn bin (I guess it wasn't too expensive after all) where another senior lady was picking out which ears of corn she wanted. The two got into a yelling match over corn! I couldn't believe it. I've never witnessed two senior ladies fighting over anything, much less an ear of corn.
I quickly scanned my grocery list and found that I needed new razor blades, so I promptly ran to the aisle with the razors and stayed there for a minute to digest what I had just seen (and to avoid the carnage)! If necessary, I could grab one of the razors and use it as a weapon if it came down to self-defense. Aerosol deodorant might come in handy also as a substitute for pepper spray.
As I was waiting (ok, hiding), in the razor aisle, I overheard a man and his wife (yes, they were both senior citizens) yelling at a young man about being overcharged for something or other, AND they were not given a proper receipt. The poor kid being verbally assaulted explained that they needed to go to customer service, and they told him they had done that already and were not satisfied with the answer they received. He seemed to be at a loss and I peaked around the corner (if you think I planned on leaving that razor aisle, you are crazy) and the guy looked like he was going to pass out. He explained, AGAIN, that they needed to go to customer service, that he was just a stock boy and he couldn't help them. They walked away in a huff, mumbling about incompetence and never coming back (yeah!!!) to this store again.
I decided that the remaining items on my list weren't all that necessary. I didn't really need cat litter. I could just spray some air freshener around the cat box and hold my nose. I didn't need crackers. I've been eating way to many carbs lately anyway. Hell, I didn't even need anything for dinner either. I didn't plan on having an appetite for at least a week after the display of privileged assault on Kroger by our community's seniors. I can assure you, next week I will not go anywhere near Kroger on Senior Day, and if emergency necessitates I go there on Senior Day, I'm wearing a suit of armour and bringing a bat!
--Fortuitous Observer
