At the beginning of the year I subscribed to a flaky pick-me-up inspirational newsletter, and I usually move the daily emails directly to a folder in my inbox that serves as an "eh, I'll get to it when I get to it" catch all, and they mostly go unread, but on some days, the subject line speaks to me (or makes me say aloud, "What???"), and I click on the link and take a peek, like yesterday. The subject was "Create a Supportive Life Story" which seemed mad cheesy, but less dippy than most, so I opened it and I read this line:
"We all have a story to tell, but sometimes we get stuck in that story and become our story."
I rolled my eyes for minutes on this one, but I decided to buck up and read it anyway because there was a remote possibility I might learn something new about myself, or at least pretend to.
The article was short and precise, and rather than try to paraphrase what I believe the most important part is, I will just quote the author:
Take a moment to look at the life story you create for yourself on an ongoing basis. If you generally feel peaceful about the past and trust in your ability to handle whatever comes your way, then you are framing circumstances in a manner that serves you well. On the other hand, if you retain a lot of guilt or resentment and often feel weighed down by life, you may want to start telling yourself a new version of past and present events.
--Madisyn Taylor
My take away from this? Clean your house damn it (in an emotional sense)! We can all tell ourselves (and everyone else) some kick-ass folk tales, but if a person is not truly digging life, then there is a need to do something about it. No, we cannot re-write our past, but we can grab it by the ears, accept that we can't erase the past, but we sure has heck can deal with it first, then we can re-write our present and future life the way we want. No kidding...oh this post is so much sappier than normal, but I'm rolling with it.
For example, I could remain Esther Greenwood (The Bell Jar), and simply say, "I've suffered from depression, and that will always be my identity." Or, I could say, "Nah, thank you, I don't need to identify with that any longer, and write myself a new ending (which is what I've been doing over the past couple of years).
So, I think it is entirely possible to let go of a Hester Prynne life and rewrite a Lady Macbeth life (just don't go talking your love into killing and all that jazz).
Transform a sulky Mary Lennox into a Hermione Granger, It doesn't matter at what age you decide to write yourself a new ending. Even Mrs. Clarissa Dalloway can become Jo March.
--Fortuitous Observer
