Kwinn did something new yesterday, without dying. I took some clothes out of the dryer to fold, and that cat, without hesitation, jumped into the dryer and plopped himself down, rolled over on his back and purred with the fury of a freight train.
He is 12, which in human years is somewhere between 60 and dead. Kwinn, like most cats, is
Death by heat is something I fear with Kwinn. He isn't the sharpest tool in the shed, but he has gusto, so he goes for things, full on. Like the time he stuck his head in a huge candle .5 seconds after I blew it out. I'll paint the picture for you, because I don't have a picture, but it was a huge candle, puddle of hot wax, and one cat who decided to do a face plant in the warmth. I was scraping wax from his face and whiskers for over a week. That was 1 life.
Two weeks ago, he was prancing near the fireplace, and stuck his tail into the flames. Luckily, I was sitting on the hearth, and I saw his tail light up like a cigarette, so I grabbed his tail and put out the flames before they made their way up his back. He acted as though nothing had happened. The house smelled liked singed hair for a day. That was 2.
If Poseidon and I have the laptop on our laps, Kwinn insists (I noticed recently that I use the word 'insist' frequently when talking about cats) on cuddling as close to the laptop as he possibly can. I imagine Kwinn will get some sort of tumor from the radiation, as will we all. We love technology, and it's here to stay, so just repeat after me: "Made bed. Lie."
The cable box - The cat lays on the cable box and sleeps. We just got new cable boxes, and he is now bigger than the boxes themselves, but that doesn't stop the little weirdo. He is a svelte cat, but he hangs over all four sides of the box. Oh, and see above about radiation.
Poseidon and I are fortunate enough to have a great sun porch, which means Kiwnn is fortunate enough to have a great sun porch. He takes advantage of the sun porch. What cat wouldn't? It's like a big square box with windows on all sides. It's like, a sun pool!
And now. The dryer. I've read urban legends about cats found dead in dryers (and babies, kids, pigs, dogs, etc.) and it worries me. Kwinn is a heat-seeking junkie, but his temperature receptors, like most cats, are most reliable on the face, so he is likely to burn the rest of his body before his head realizes he is on fire.
I was around for the critical close-to-death instances, and able to put out the fires (literally and figuratively). Fortunately for all of us, the microwave is too high for Kwinn to reach, or my next post might read like one of those urban legends, starring Kwinn (only his name will of course be changed each time the story is retold).
--Amphitrite
